The next morning, I went downstairs and sat on my futon.
And I started crying.
I felt an enormous amount of sorrow over what I had done and the direction I had allowed my life to go. I knew that I had turned away from the truth I should have been seeking.
Yet, even in the middle of that sorrow, I felt welcomed by God.
I can't fully explain that experience in a way that would do it justice. I only know that while I was overwhelmed by sorrow over how far I had gone, I also had this profound sense that I could come back to Him.
I didn't feel like God was telling me to stay away.
I felt welcomed home.
Something had changed in me.
God had put a new heart in me, and all I wanted to do was please Him. My heart had genuinely changed toward sin. I no longer wanted to continue living the way I had been living. I wanted to do what was right before God. I didn't want to do anything wrong or say anything wrong at all.
